Up not that too early and ready for the off. Slightly worrying the National Express bus doesn't turn up. Still there is another one soon. By the time it does arrive it is closely being followed by the next one. We then find out that although not listed it does stop much nearer home! We get to Luton drastically early so early that the flight is not even open so its opened for us. So its off to get something to eat then the departure lounge for a couple of hours. Of course it happens again , as the personal stuff and we are scanned the guy calls me madam LOL Not bad seeing as I am not "dressed". I don't know about others but I love it. So there we are sat sitting there as you do, people watching, when I see her, snotty nose tart looking down her nose at everyone. Look dear if you want to be superior to everyone else then travel via heathrow, cheapskate Luton is not the place for you. Just get used to the fact you want to fly cheap then you have to mix with the rabble, I do.
So a nice hot Berlin replaces a cold London and Luton. We grab a cab and are at our swish abode for four days of four star luxury. OK so we know this is going to be a 'funky' hotel but we never imagined it was going to be this funky. The reception area is humungeous,
which opens out into the lounge area
and then into the bar
and eventually the restaurant. Music plays 24/7 and varies from gentle murmurings in the early morning with increasing volume and funkiness towards the end, although on our last morning I am listening to Jimi Hendrix and Purple Haze in the lift at seven in the morning!.
A nice young man shows us around the hotel and then takes us and our luggage to our room.. We press the button to call the lift and….. Oh My Days, the doors open to reveal… a totally baby pink lift with a picture overhead!
Ensconced in our room its a quick unpack and out and this time the lift is……… lime green !
The exterior of the hotel is just as amazing as the interior, parts of the Berlin wall used as decoration....
As we leave for a stroll about we walk into our friends Peter and Sarah so its off for something to eat. We find ourselves a nice down at heel kebab cafe and gossip. Although we had not planned doing anything that evening but are convinced by them that we should. I'm feeling shattered so elect not to dress. Off we whizz to Bar ll in Wiener Strasse, Kreuzberg. We see a few people we know and meet some new ones then run into Suzanna who we met at Pride in Stockholm a few years ago when she walked for Dolenta's fashion show. We see Mr Chips sans Tina and Madame Caramel and also meet a few new people. Exhausted by the days events we take our leave around 1 ish and zoom back to the hotel in Peters hire car. Next day is a total change, its raining and rather cool and madame is feeling "off" so has extended sleeping. I on the other hand have been out since 7am wandering return at 8 only to go out again in search of a pharmacy and paracetamol. An hour later I return empty handed. By ten she has recovered enough to go out and seek food and we find a pharmacy, eventually.
Decisions, decisions, do I go to the exhibition on my own or not.
Well in the end I do. All made up and dressed I go down and lo and behold I see Mr Chips and partner who are staying at the same hotel. Are they going? Yes they are so we share a cab. Only a five minute or so drive. First thing is to find somewhere to put the silly shoes on then a wander. Run into Mistress Hannah and enquire of PFK's location and make our way to see him. Long chats while Mistress Hannah changes then a wander. See the boys from Latex 101 and then run into Mistress Caramel for more cuddling and gossip. After long chats all round its time to go. Do I walk it, only about 15-20 minutes or taxi? Well the question is soon answered there is a taxi available and waiting. Madame has awoken and as its cold and windy we elect to eat in and very nice it is albeit pricey. I do a quick change as I am told I do not look up to my usual standard, so its the new skirt and the black peasant top and the Miss L Fire shoes Now if I were to say to you we had a burger and fries you might think, eh? what?, pardon? Well let me assure you dear reader there is such a thing as a four star burger. How do I know? I had one and it was worth every Euro !
Sunday is ball day. It is gloriously sunny and hot. Out for breakfast on Warschauer Strasse and a day of relaxing. The flyer posters are out in force and lamposts are thick with them, and I mean thick!
Well after I have had my early morning constitutional.
A walk down to Kopeniker Strasse to see where the ball is to be held which I find later is wrong, its next door.
It is sooo hot we give up sitting in the sun for fear of getting burnt. We lunch out then rest before the evening. A light dinner in the hotel, a delicious prawn salad. With this we get, as a freebie, because we are sooo nice, free bread and an olive oil and balsamic dip complete with salt, in a testube. Now how trendy is that?. Now when one is eating in trendy places one has to be a little wary of menu descriptions. Prawn salad in a glass. Mmmmm. We enquire. Oh no not A glass. A large glass bowl no less and totally yummy to boot.
So then it is time to get ready and off to the ball about 9.30. A line of taxis waits outside and we are off. A fair number of people have arrived and we thread our way through. Finding somewhere to sit is a priority. Luckily we manage to grab a table and we are settled. We see Suzanna from Friday night again, Bobette and Sally, PFK and Mistress Hannah but greeting of the night if not forever has to go to Mistress Absolute who is a vision in white latex, although as I said to her, she always is a vision. On seeing us she says to her companions, I have to stop to talk to my most favourite people in the whole world !
We were not that impressed with the outfits but of course there were some rather special ones. I manage to grab a conversation with Alan from Torture Garden who is one of the DJ's. We never managed to see Mad Alan or Madame Caramel, saw Miss Britney in the distance and hear that DeeBee never came after all ! Most unusual. We arrive back at the hotel gone three and on our way to our room cross from one building to another....
A slow day recovering after getting to bed at 3.30. A stagger out to get breakfast then over the bridge and a wander
,somewhere new. A look at the murals
on the east side gallery then lunch. An all you can eat, oh dear we were doing quite well until the freebies arrived. Phew that took some getting through. We wander back to the hotel and run into PFK and Sarah trying desperately to waste time before their flight so we go into the hotels art gallery for an hour and then they are off back to London. The tiredness now begins to strike home. I am totally shattered. Madame has a couple of hours sleep then we have dinner, madame elects just chips while I select fish to go with mine. Oh my that was nice. My own bowl of fresh tartare sauce and olive oil and balsamic vinegar in their own pipettes, deeeelish. I finally give in around 9.30 ish and collapse into bed and the arms of morpheus.
I cancel the 6.00 alarm call as I am up and at reception at 5.30 Packing is 99.9% done and soon we shall be off for our flight home.
So there I am, in Luton Airport. What is the first thing I need on my return? A cigarette lighter. Off to Smiths. Have you a lighter I say. The young idiot says yes... but I only have a pink one. So I say to him I really couldn't care less about the colour which he finds amusing. I add that its what is inside that is important. So I am supposed to be bothered that an item is pink, this is somehow important? Even if I were bothered it is an object that will spend 99.9% of its life in my pocket. Good grief why do these people attach so much importance to things and god forbid someone, who you don't know, and will never see again might, just might think ill of you because you have a pink lighter.
The same applies to our coach diver. When we get off he asks which are our cases. That one, that one and the pink one I say dragging off the first two myself leaving him with the one nearest to him. Oh that's right he says, leave me with the pink one. FFS you are only moving it three feet, no one is going to see you. Methinks that is you that might have a problem with your sexuality not me.
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