A trip out

Up with the lark, feed cats, other household duties, have breakfast, exercise then I have to get ready. A trip out today. Shower and a full shave, pluck eyebrows well its another femme day out tomorrow as well :-) So I get the slap on and I'm off out by 9.00. Get the bus and off at Selfridges. I just have to go through the food hall every time I go there, its not just the sights but the smells, quite, quite mouthwatering. Aaaaanyway its downstairs for madame's Nespresso capsules then off for a wander. Perfumery then ladies fashions and of course the shoe department then downstairs and out through Miss Selfridge into Duke Street
As I approach St Christopher's Place a Big Issue vendor enquired 'if the beautiful woman' would like a copy, I decline gracefully and have a little giggle to myself. Its then into the heat of Oxford Street. Phew it really is hot as I dive into the relative cool of John Lewis. I need a hook, a little hook to hang a calendar on in the kitchen. Seeing how it appears the clientele of John Lewis no longer indulge in DIY the department has shrunk to miniscule proportions. Where else I ask myself? Ah curtains and trimmings, net curtain hooks of course. The last of the big spenders gets a pack for a whole 75p.
Right I am dying of thirst and time for a fresh experience. Of course I have eaten out before but always in company. Now trays and I have a hate, hate relationship I hate carrying them and they take exception to me using them. Things slide all over the place and I always over compensate when objects start to slide but on this occasion everything is fine. I take my lemonade and my extremely naughty fruit scone with clotted cream and strawberry jam to a table where I can be queen of all I survey.
As an aside I notice that that the Bistro is offering a Coronation Tea in July in collaboration with Gizzi Erkine. Ah how times change. I remember the Honourable Grizelda, for that is what she is, when she was a piercer of flesh at Cold Steel in Camden while studying at Pru Leith's cookery school. Aaaanyway I digress, in all the time I am there I don't even get a raised eyebrow, nothing. Two young ladies sit next to me and have the barefaced cheek to be slender and devour a wholemeal bun with bacon, sausage and a fried egg! Its more than I can stand so its time to go. A quick look around the photo department and its down the escalator and back into the heat.
I stroll along Oxford Street without a care in world which passes me by totally oblivious to this aging tranny. Back into the cool that is Selfridges and out the other side that is Baker Street, a quick scan around M&S and the bus home for lunch. I would have stayed out for lunch but that would have left madame without a lunchtime companion, yes I'm good like that. So its home and swiftly into a bikini and into the garden.